Blingalix

What do you do when have just bought your third Lamborghini and haven’t a clue what your next toy will be? Or perhaps you just want a bit of excess once in a while? Either way, why not go crazy and consider some candy bling in the shape of our barmy Blingalix range, the 24K Gold Lix lolly and the Pearl lollipop.

All that glitters is gold even when it comes to candy apparently. This translucent slab of lollyness conceals gold flakes within its gold-coloured exterior. And if it’s not enough that there is precious metal stuck inside, the thing is champagne-flavoured too. Mad or what!

This particular lollipop is made from 24 karat California gold. That’s not the American soccer team of the same name but the real stuff in leaf form, fit for human consumption. On that note, gold is said to contain various anti-bacterial properties when eaten. In fact, take a look at Japan and you’ll notice that they still use gold in all sorts of food and drink items. And don’t forget Goldschläger, a drink containing tiny pieces of gold leaf. Maybe you could combine the two for a precious metal extravaganza.

Staying with the bling but throwing in a pinch of aphrodisiac into the mix, we present the Pearl Lollipop, a lolly made from raw cane sugar, wild Madagascan vanilla essence and ground natural pearls. For millennia, ground pearls have been recognised as a natural aphrodisiac and where even used in child-bearing rituals in China and Japan.

Give a massive hint to your other half and offer the Pearl Lollipop on a dark rainy night in. Failing that, give one to someone who has simply caught your eye. Maybe even carry a few around when you’re on a night out, remove the manufacturer’s label from around the stick and put your contact details on instead. You never know… But beware if you are sucking on one of these while using public transport. You may find yourself suddenly drawn to the opposite sex.

So when you find yourself inadvertently chomping on that gold necklace, then perhaps the 24K Gold Lix lolly is the solution. And if you need a novel way to spice things up in the bedroom, try the libido lifting Pearl Lollipop, it’s devilishly delicious.

Candy Floss Maker

Look into my eyes, not around the eyes, in to my eyes. You’re under. Reach back in time to your childhood when the funfair really was fun because your stomach was stronger (probably due to lack of alcohol damage) and you could sit on those rides with no problems at all. Now think candy floss and how the outing was never complete without it. Hummmm candy floss. When you wake you will remember just how good the sticky stuff tasted.

And that’s where we come in. The Candy Floss Maker is a very simple to use machine which gives you the opportunity to make your own candy floss in the comfort of your own home or garden. How good is that! If you like to floss, this is something you probably would never have dreamed of back in the day.

Once you have clipped the white receptacle to the base, all you need to do is plug it all in using the AC adaptor, allow the machine to heat up for a few minutes and then pour some sugar inside the central head. You’ll then start to notice the threads of floss appearing out of nowhere in to the bowl. This plastic container is big enough to contain the sugary output in all its whispy glory.

Once there is enough candy floss to be scooped up, grab some and place it on one of the paper cones included with the Candy Floss Maker. If you want different coloured floss, just add a smidgen of food colouring for some red, yellow, pink and blue treats. Or black if your sense of humour is that way inclined. Finally, make sure you cover your entire face with the stuff. Go on, get sticky together!

Candy Grabber

Walk past a full size version of one of these at the seaside or in a funfair, and like a mermaid it always has an irresistible pull, tempting you to your fate. Next thing you know, you’ve had not 1 but 10 goes and your wallet has been inexplicably emptied of all its coinage. Is there anyone out there who is able to leave the machine alone after one go? No. These dastardly contraptions really were and still are addictive. And more often than not, the victim walks away empty-handed, the pointless fluffy toys peering back at you through the glass. Of course it is sometimes possible to pass by and resist the lure of these evil machines. But not always...

Well you needn’t worry about this any longer. The Candy Grabber allows you to indulge in sugar heaven all you want, safe in the knowledge that you’re kids’ lunch money will not get spanked on mere frivolities. Put whatever you want in there as long as it fits but in most cases you’ll find yourself wacking sweets in there.

Pop some real money or one of the provided fake coins into the Candy Grabber and some strange nostalgic music pipes up, charming you all the way back to your childhood and those days spent at the fair. While this cacophony resounds you have just over a minute to control the large grabber inside the machine and rescue one of the sweet treats laying helplessly below. As you run out of time the music speeds up, finally come to a halt when your time is up.

And treats they certainly will be as the Candy Grabber won’t give up its contents too easily. Manoeuvre the three joysticks left, right, up and down to control the grabber on its quest for sugar heaven. If you do manage to catch something, drop it in the hole and you’re rewarded by some applause. Silly but satisfying, especially as you pop your confectionery into your eagerly-awaiting gob. Yum. This infuriating contraption may actually stop you from just reaching in to that Quality Streets box at work and eating 1 chocolate per minute. It will become a real pleasure to fight for your prize.

So stop grabbing ladies bottoms and instead refine your hand technique with the Candy Grabber. A treat catcher for the masses at home or at work.

Hot Dog Roller

Sausage? Anyone for... sausage? This is a great little gadget that will spice up your life no end. The Hot Dog Roller is a rather authentic looking replica of those old hot dog stalls. Only difference here is that it won’t take up your entire living room. Just a little bit of a table.

We all love a hot dog and this red and white mini-stall has been specifically designed to cater for all your sausage needs, that is its only purpose in life. Find a plug socket then insert said plug into the hole. Select your desired heat setting (to determine the speed) and whack on a maximum of 4 large frankfurters or 8 small ones, then sit back, relax and crack open a tinny. The Hot Dog Roller will do the rest.

That’s right lazy bones; this clever cooker slowly turns your sausages on its 5 non-stick rollers, cooking em nice and evenly. But that’s not all. We all know that heat rises. Well this cleverly designed Hot Dog Roller has a handy upper compartment for heating your hot dog buns. You can store up to 6 under that red and white stripped hinged lid. You know the finished product tastes so much better when everything is warm. Anyone who has tried eating a burger with a freezing cold slice of tomato straight from the fridge will know. It’s good but somehow not quite so enjoyable.

Finally, the Hot Dog Roller is a complete doddle to clean thanks the removable drip tray. Just like a household toaster, this tray catches anything that falls and is very easy to wipe clean. We’ve used ours several times and it’s now waiting cleanly and patiently for the next party we have. Not that you have to use it exclusively for parties of course. Too much of a good thing? Na don’t be silly, get those hot dogs in!!!

Kids will simply adore this and so will men and women all over this sausage-loving globe. The Hot Dog Roller. Woof woof, roll over boy...

Oxygen

In an old French film, two travellers from the 12th century arrive in our time and the first thing they do is turn their noses up and comment on how bad the air smells. If that really is the case then luckily for use we have gotten used to the foul stench of our air.

However, it is pretty obvious that air quality has been deteriorating over the years. This is where an O-Pur Oxygen canister may come in handy. The idea of oxygen in a can may sound silly but it could actually have some real benefits. Our beautiful planet’s air supplies won’t be running out just yet but if you’re stuck in a busy smoky city, with the thoughts of fresh air biting away and the desire for the countryside growing by the minute. Well why not give O-Pur Oxygen a go.

Simply place the canister’s inhaler over your mouth and nose, take a squirt of some very clean oxygen which is 99.5 % pure, and sit back and feel the power of fresh O-Pur Oxygen. Well the effects can vary but one situation that seems to have raised a consensus is the use of O-Pur Oxygen after a heavy night’s drinking. A blast of O2 may very well lend a helping hand to you’re hangover struggle. Don’t forget those painkillers and flat cola. And fried breakfast…

Space Food

Going up in space is all well and good (not that we’d really know) but what happens when you get a case of the munchies? Back in the day, the first American in space dined his heart out on applesauce. He probably felt like he was eating baby food – and he probably cried like an infant too. The big girl. Things have improved since then. Now anyone can get a neckfull of nutrition with Space Food, cosmic cuisine at its finest. It’s perfect for all us lot who haven’t a hope in hell of leaving the Earth’s atmos’.

Being stuck in the deep dark dismal depths of the unknown universe for months on end calls for special food that provides a tasty reminder of home to all our heroic space crusaders. It must also have non-perishable tendencies. Really really ridiculously big non-perishable tendencies.

That is why NASA was so very thoughtful in cooking up some real grub for its astronauts all those years ago. Real food, yes, but somewhat different. It has been freeze-dried to remove water and placed in special pouches that block out moisture and oxygen. This enables spacemen (of the human kind) to store food for extended periods of time without refrigeration. We have some examples direct from the Kennedy Space Centre’s magnificent menu right here for your dining pleasure and this Space Food actually is the real thing. Choose from freeze-dried strawberries, cinnamon apple wedges or everyone’s favourite, Neapolitan ice-cream. Weird thing is, they actually taste pretty much like they should - just a little different and certainly quite a bit drier. But they don’t leave a weird taste in your mouth. We reckon the most interesting one is the Neapolitan ice-cream as each of its three flavours (chocolate, vanilla, strawberry) individually taste like wot they outta. Bizarre…

Serving suggestons:

Space Food will come in very handy if you are going camping for a few days in the wild as you won’t have a fridge to store your favourite snacks. It is also very compact and will therefore take up no room at all in that already tiny tent of yours. You could also keep it in your car for emergencies. For that time when your stuck in the biggest traffic jam on the motorway in the middle of winter. Traffic’s stationary for hours and you can’t put the heater on. Wouldn’t it be great to have some food handy as well as that emergency blanket you also thought of packing…

On a slightly less dramatic note, if you are planning an anti-gravity outing in one of those big cargo jets that simulates weightlessness by doing vertical dives, why not buy some Capri Sun drink to wash down the strawberries. It would be the ultimate space simulation. Incidentally, those Capri Suns are the perfect example of space technology filtering down to us layman type, improving packaging and shelf life of our earth-bound foods and drinks. Which is very nice thank you very much.

So prepare to enjoy strawberries, cinnamon apple wedges and Neapolitan ice-cream heaven. Next stop, crops being grown in labs on Mars! It’s the future, just you wait and see. In the meantime, tuck in to some yummy desert treats with our carefully selected ‘A la carte’ menu of Space Food... NASA nosh? Nice.

Chocolate Fountain

Mmm mmm… chocolate, lashings and lashings of the stuff, but the closest you normally get to this amount of it will be licking the spoon from one of your Mum's dodgy cake recipes. Luckily, thanks to the chocolatiers at Giles & Posner that’s no longer the case. Now you can easily release your inner Oompa Loompa and fulfil your secret chocolatey fantasies with the help of the Chocolate Fountain.

Whether it’s to have your very own personal choc-fest or you’re buying it for a friend, the Chocolate Fountain makes the perfect gift for choccy fanatics across the globe. Seriously, what else could possibly surpass dipping stuff in free flowing melted chocolate? Nitto!

But how does it work? When you receive your Chocolate Fountain you'll also get a bag of Giles & Posner Luxury Fondue Chocolate for free. Simply pop the bag in the microwave for a couple of minutes and your fondulicios chocolatey goop will be ready for consumption! Just pour the melted chocolate into the heating basin and flick the switch. The chocolate is then rotated up an internal shaft which overflows out and over the top of your fountain. Scrumptious!

Once you've finally got over the fact that there's nearly a kilo of melted Belgian chocolate cascading in front of you, you can roll your sleeves up, chuck on a napkin on and start dipping your delicious delicacies. Strawberries, marshmallows or your own two fingers will suffice!

This beautifully built polished black Chocolate Fountain is perfect for parties and any other time of the week you’re feeling a bit Wonka-esque! Wait until your mates clap eyes on it; you'll be whipping it out on every occasion! Just sit back, open wide and start scoffing like you were eating a bag of Chocolate buttons with diamonds at the bottom!

Edible Candy Underwear

Food is important. Wearing underwear is too. Remember when your parents would say: “Don’t play with your food!” Well, now it’s time to shout “go away mum, I’m a grown up now, I’ll do what I want.” Luckily the people at Gasworks have managed to combine food and underwear with this Edible Candy Underwear. Cheers guys!

Hum…, edible underwear from a company called Gasworks. Think about it, there is some sort of filthy irony in there somewhere. But don’t worry, we won’t go searching for it. No, instead, we will talk about the joy of wearing food around your intimate parts.

Ok so these may not be one of the classiest items we've reviewed but when it comes to helping everyone look sexy, then we at Gizmole are happy to oblige. Available as a G-string, a bra or a man’s posing pouch, the Edible Candy Underwear provide something for everyone. Well all the naughty people anyway. Each different underwear set comes with over 400 candies which you may actually recognise as those sweets that where always worn on the wrist as a bracelet and munched by kids everywhere. Again something strangely ironic about that. What was once an innocent childhood pleasure has now been turned into an accessory of desire.

A bra for the lazy, just tilt your head down a bit and get chomping, a posing pouch for the adventurous men among you and a G-String for the woman that hates to cook but loves to see a man eat! Just put on, heat & serve.

It’s fun to be rude once, twice, thrice in a while so don’t have a duvet day, have an underwear day with the Edible Candy Undies. Chomp on this madame. Hum...

Chocolate Ants

Here are two rules of common sense. 1) Chocolate is good when in the mouth and the tummy. Naughty yes, but nice and it shouldn’t be placed anywhere else. 2) Ants are insects and belong not in the mouth but in the earth and shouldn’t be placed anywhere else. To do so would be naughty and not nice. Unless you combine the two. And that’s where these Chocolate Ants come in.

The hungry people at Edible like to do things differently hence these tasty little morsels of choco-insect heaven. And mark our words, these little pieces of heaven are quite an experience. They haven’t just popped round the back of the house and gathered a few hundred tiny terrors from the back garden. No, that simply wouldn’t do. These little babies are Queen Leafcutter Ants from the Atta laevigata species (or Fatass ant - yes indeed), an edible ant hailing from Colombia. The local Guane Indians have been munching on these cocoa-free for years and they like to toast em to obtain that added crunch. And believe us they do crunch in quite an audible fashion. Absolutely brilliant.

But don’t be put off by all this. These Chocolate Ants actually taste good. It’s a veritable explosion of different sensations on the ol palate. If you nibble a little of the chocolate on its own, you’ll get that tell-tale bitter taste which only comes from real chocolate. Forget Cadbury this is the finest Belgian stuff with 70% cocoa. When you try the whole shebang though, that ant does add a subtle something to the mix. Now on several occasions we bit off half the ant to reveal a massive stripy abdomen - Fatass ants they certainly are – but we then chickened out for a bit before chomping our way through that second half. All in all though, it makes you feel as though you’ve just passed a Bushtucker trial or something.

Insects are eaten throughout the world and this has been going on for thousands of years. Now that may not be a reason to eat them but wait, there’s more. Insects offer high levels of essential amino acids meaning they are good for your protein intake. Ants = healthy. Fine but try one without chocolate and it’s probably not so easy to eat.

These Chocolate Ants are great for personal consumption as they contain energy giving enzymes but what ever you do, don’t forget your duty as a gadget loving human to play nasty tricks on unsuspecting meat-eaters. Let them eat ant!

Toffee Scorpion

For those of you who are brave enough to take the test or just extremely bored with your standard newsagent’s toffee bar this sweet covered invertebrate will definitely get your taste buds tantalized. Why you ask. Simple answer? Captured inside this giant slab of amber toffee candy is one of the world's deadliest creatures – the notorious Chinese scorpion!

Since shows like I'm a Celebrity Get Me out of Here and Fear Factor, chewing on deadly insects hasn't looked like such an odd concept. We strongly disagree! Personally we couldn't think of anything worse than chewing on a sticky bit of candy with one of the world's most dangerous animals captured inside it, but hey, whatever floats your boat!

We guess it’s down to the individual really. Where some people may love a bowl of supernoodles first thing in the morning, others will devour a whopping great lump of haggis. The same concept works here. On most roadside stalls in Thailand and China you can buy scorpions and other such delicacies as a lunchtime snack, even though we think this is a lovely idea, we can’t seem to work out why this hasn’t caught on in the U.K – answers on a postcard please!!!

Once you’ve received your Toffee Scorpion it’s time to start scoffing on this tasty slab of stickiness. Get your mouth firmly wrapped around its gooey length and tuck in to the sugar-free toffee until you reach the depths of its deadly inners, the Chinese Scorpion – which apparently tastes something similar to a peanut Okay so the scorpion’s not really deadly inside this critter-filled candy, that would be silly!

Each scorpion is specifically bred for human consumption so fortunately for your unlucky victims they won't be rushed into Emergency with a killer scorpion sting! Obviously you don't have to buy these for other people, why not buy the Toffee Scorpion for yourself and see if you can stomach the acquired taste. Also Chinese scorpions are said to be an aphrodisiac so, why not scoff on one of these before a long night of passion and see if it gives you a sting in your tail!

Death Mints

For some unfortunates, transient bad breath is a very temporary but common condition and a rather embarrassing one at that. It’s generally caused after a run-in with a stomach twisting curry or a bout with a baguette of garlic bread! Morning breath is another common example of transient bad breath but it generally disappears on its own with the aid of chewing gum or a quick brush of the teeth. But for some unlucky individuals having breath like a hippo is part of there everyday life and that’s exactly where we come in.

Death Mints are the potent breast fresheners for your pungent palate. Next time you feel like an extreme dose of halitosis coming your way just pop one of these super strong bad breathe deflectors in to your funnel and you'll be breathing crispy fresh breath all day long! We give you our personal guarantee that Death Mints are dedicated to take the smell out of your yell!

Okay, so some people will argue that you could go down the long winded route of brushing your teeth 6 times daily or even scraping your tongue with a hefty piece of sandpaper, but where’s the fun in that? The main problem is that bad breath isn’t even very well understood or even recognized as a treatable condition by most physicians and dentists so effective treatment is difficult to find. That’s exactly why the boff’s came up with the idea of Death Mints – an affordable solution to your flower wilting breathe.

And it doesn’t stop there! Why not have competitions with your friends and see who can eat the most Death Mints at once, you could even time each other and take multiple menthol mayhem to a completely different level.

Death Mints come in a collectible coffin-shaped tin and contain 100 potent mints that will give you fresh breath to die for. The makers say that Death Mints are the preferred breathe mints of corpses, vampires and zombies and even though this is quite a bold statement we couldn’t agree more. So add a tin of Death Mints to your cart pronto before you can’t see the buy button where your breathe has melted the screen.

Toxic Waste Sour Candy

If you’re fed up of sucking lemons and snorting sherbet to feed your sour cravings it's about time you experienced the ultimate taste explosion of Toxic Waste Sour Candy! When we tell you these expression altering sweets are sour, we mean it - please don't take these words lightly! If you enjoy having your face screwed up like a cat's derrière and a good 15 minutes of tantalising tongue tickling then these super sour sweets are right up your street.

When we began researching Toxic Waste Sour Candy we had pen and paper at the ready. Turns out we didn't really need it because one flavour each was enough! Even still, the array of faces being pulled by our research team was pure hilarity. At first you experience a long lasting blast of extreme sour flavour from the outside layer, next, the sweet tasting candy middle, then, just when you thought it was over....It’s not!

Toxic Waste has the only double-action sour flavour on the planet. Hidden deep inside each Toxic Waste candy is a top secret super-sour core which literally knocks your socks off.
Each drum of Toxic Waste comes with about 15 pieces of palate punishing candy and has an assortment of 5 different flavours; watermelon, black cherry, blue raspberry, lemon and apple.

Weasel Coffee

What better to keep you going than a fresh cup of Vietnamese coffee? Ok, so you wouldn’t normally associate Vietnam as one of the famous coffee countries of the globe, but you certainly will once you get a swig of Weasel Coffee down your neck!

This Weasel Coffee is possibly one of the strangest and rare varieties of coffee to be found on the planet – and the reason being? It’s been eaten and regurgitated by rare Vietnamese weasels, no joke! The wild weasels prowl the coffee plantations and eat the best and ripest of cherries, but rather than digest them, decide to chuck them up instead! Then the observant natives sift through the weasels vomit and sell the coffee beans direct to the manufacturer!

Sounds disgusting? It’s really not. Because the cherries have been in contact with the weasel’s gastric juices, it seems to dramatically alter the taste of the coffee once it’s been brewed. It has the most sumptuous chocolatey flavour and won’t leave any unpleasant aftertastes in your mouth.

For generations the Weasel Coffee – also known as ‘Chon’ has been regarded by the local plantation owners and workers as the highest quality coffee. For this reason, there is a limited harvest each year, making Weasel Coffee one of the most exclusive drinks in the world. The Weasel coffee beans are safe, sterilised and are ready for human consumption. Don’t believe us? Try it!

Black Black Chewing Gum

Who needs fruity flavours and mild menthol when you can experience the ‘Hi-technical taste’ of Black Black Chewing Gum? That’s right, the packaging really doesn’t lie and occasionally you’ll even find a stick with ‘Yes, Chewing!’ written on it. Don’t ask us why, but the idea of having a mixture of black chewing gum and the appalling use of the English language really caught our eye!

Lotte’s Black Black Chewing Gum is the powerfully caffeinated gum and candy sensation from Japan which is designed to wake you up with a real punch when you’re feeling low and could do with a lift. Originally made famous in the U.S by Wired Magazine it took the States by storm and is preparing to get your taste buds tantalized in the U.K! Jean Claude Van Damme even put his name on it in the Japanese commercial – Has there ever been so much hype about chewing gum? We don’t think so…

Black Black is one of a kind, refreshing and packed full of energy that wakes you up with a devilish kick - and quickly, too, since caffeine in gum is absorbed 3 times faster than your standard cup of coffee. It also contains niacinamide, a form of Vitamin B-3 that has many uplifting beneficial properties.

Lotte’s Black Black Gum comes in either 1 or 4 packs and contains 9 sticks of gum ready to take your breath away – literally. So if you’re fed up of drinking bucket loads of coffee to wave goodbye to that ghastly hangover or chewing 17 packs of your regular chewies to get firmly rid of that morning breath, why not kill two birds with one stick of black chewing gum and join the Japanese chewing revolution by adding one to your cart immediately. Remember, black is the new white!

Pearl Dust

Aphrodisiacs have been around for years and so has Noel Edmonds, but I guess that’s another rant. Most are easy to come by and available in your high street shops, but the pearl has got to be the most coveted of the lot considering it began as just a foreign body lodged in an Oysters mushy midst. Instead of just coughing it up, they actually bothered creating a beautiful little pearl, only to suffer the news that we rip ‘em apart, whack a whole in it and sling ‘em on a necklace. How’s that for gratitude? The poor little blighters!

So how do you get an aphrodisiac from a single pearl you ask? Surely you can’t go around swallowing the awkward little buggers whole? That would be stupid! Well, now there’s no need to get one stuck in your throat because it’s been ground into Pearl Dust. Now you can get this potent little love candy in a handy capsule allowing you to quickly and easily sprinkle your magic on to an array of mouth watering food and drink with a long lasting, libido lifting effect.

Thanks to our insect gobbling friends at Edible, we can all enjoy the heart pounding qualities of Pearl Dust without having to chuck your Auntie Lilly’s antique necklace in the blender. Not does this only put hold on yet another family feud, we’re pretty sure the fat cats at Kenwood wouldn’t cover you on the guarantee!

Edible Pearl Dust is hand grounded from Japanese and Chinese pearls and is perfect for sprinkling on just about anything you can fit in your gob. Champagne, white wine even a chocolate éclair – just replace the hundreds and thousands with some Pearl Dust and watch the partner of your dreams fall at your knees from a spot of desert.

So forget about swallowing sloppy shellfish, harvesting horny goat weed and shaking salt and pepper on your fig sandwich, all you have to do now is grab your little glass vial of Pearl Dust and give your fish and chips a liberal smothering. Add one to your cart now and you will soon be making pearl necklaces of your very own!

Who Dares Burns

There was a film called “Some like it hot”. An old film, but a good ol’ classic. And when it comes to spicy things there really are two major social groups: those who will always go for chilli sauce without batting an eyelid, and those who will bat both eyelids uncontrollably and shed tears-a-plenty at the mere mention of the stuff.

For that second group of people - the nutters - Who Dares Burns is the sauce you need to spice up (oh dear pun-tastic) your crazy cookery life. Three types of chilli pepper including the chipotle have been blended to create this Luciferian liquid and it to be used extremely sparingly on all meats, vegetables and seafood. Add to curries, stirfry, soups, stews, eggs, beans, chips, and why not cocktails (of death) too. So many options, so many inches of intestine to ruin. Brilliant. One word of warning though. Keep this stuff away your eyes and sensitive skin. Unless you’re a real sadomasochist…

And now we go over to that redder corner we mentioned at the beginning. They’ve only gone and made a HOTTER version Who Dares Burns 2nd Assault for when the odd 100.000 scoviles just aren’t enough. Now we’re clearly moving away from the sauce world and firmly entering the realm of dilute-only multi-purpose kitchen cleaner. Not to be used as a standalone sauce, ever.

Although we know that won’t stop some of you fire-breathing types out there from spreading it liberally over everything. We all completely chickened out here and mixed it in to a non-hot sauce. Yummy yes, but needless to say, the temperature was certainly not temperate.

All in all, Who Dares Burns and WDB 2nd Assault are two seriously crazy options to seriously enhance your grub concoction. Genuinely designed for food, they can also be used for very evil pranks on friends but whatever you do, take care to avoid eyes and sensitive skin. Extra toilet paper seriously not included.

Civet Coffee (Kopi Luwak)

What better than a fresh cup of coffee to wake you up first thing in the morning? Or that’s generally the 9 o’clock routine in force at Gizmole HQ. Whether it be a triple mocca knicker knocker or a Crappa-frappa-cino, nothing will knock your socks off like a warm mug of Civet Coffee, also known by the coffee connoisseurs out there as Kopi Luwak.

For those of you who are scratching your head with confusion, let us explain… Kopi Luwak Coffee is shipped direct from the darkest corners of the Indonesian Jungle and only about 100 kilo’s of the stuff is collected each year. Ok, so 100 kilo’s doesn’t sound like much you titter, and is certainly not up to Nescafe’s standards, but when we tell you where the coffee beans have been fermenting for the last couple of months you’ll understand why.

The main reason for Civet Coffee’s titillating taste is that it has been fermenting in the belly of a Sumutran Civet Cat. Mmm yummy! These rather odd looking feline’s skulk around the coffee fields late at night and eat only the juiciest and ripest of cherries. The cherry stones (which over a period of time turn into coffee beans) are then collected from the droppings by some of the locals, bagged up and sent directly to you guys to sup from your favourite coffee cup.

Ok, so the description doesn’t sound too appealing but the natives consider this exclusive and extremely rare coffee to be the finest blend in the world. Civet Coffee has a very distinctive chocolatey flavour and is sterilised especially for human consumption. Oh, and we forget to mention, it’s also delicious too!

So next time you’ve got one of your frappacino drinking friends around with pinkie fingers aloft, slip a spoonful of Kopi Luwak in their cuppa and relish the look on their faces. Two sugars please luv!

Insectilix Lolly

Lollypop, lollypop, oh lolly lolly lolly. If only the chordettes who wrote that annoying song had seen these Insect-Inside lollies before putting pen to paper. It probably would have spiced things up and turned out like this: lollypop lollypop What the??!!! lolly lolly lolly… Shame really.

Every one loves creepy crawlies right? Well only the most hardened of creepcrawlyphobics among us will back away from these Insectilix Lollies. What we have here are two lollypops each with a different insect trapped within. If you like vodka then go snare yourself the scorpion but if you prefer tequila then go for the worm. These are just too cool to be ignored and if you’re gonna suck on a lolly like so many people nowadays then why not try something a bit different.

Up first is an Insect-Inside with a scorpion covered in vodka-flavoured sweetness. This is probably what George Clooney’s character in ‘From Dusk Till Dawn’ would have sucked on had he know about them. The affable arachnid was bred for human consumption in China and heat-treated to remove any toxins. And before you ask, the beast has been purged of its venomous magic wand. Or in plain English, the sting has been removed. One word of warning though, and this goes out to the men: remember that Chinese scorpions are apparently a powerful aphrodisiac so beware, once you’ve sucked and chewed you may be walking around with tent in pants!

Now it’s tequila time. If you like your worms non-wriggly and definitely dead then this tequila-flavoured Insectilix Lolly is for you. Just like its scorpion counterpart, this little crawler has been bred specifically for us carnivorous humans but has had 5-star treatment being fed a yummy diet of cereals and fresh greens. Lucky beggars. Not so lucky now though…

No prizes for guessing who’s responsible for these bizarre culinary delights. It’s the boys and girls from Edible and thank god for their weird wacky novelty ideas. Who would have thought we’d be liking vodka-flavoured scorpion and tequila-flavoured worm lollypops and then eating the bonus prize hidden inside. Well hardly hidden…

Ice Cream Ball

Hill rolling came around a few years ago. But that was for humans in huge bouncy see-through balls. Good laugh but probably not recommended after eating. Well we want to eat and we want to eat ice-cream. Lot’s of it please mummy, please… Well forget mummy, go and make it yourself with the Ice Cream Ball, a fun spherical way to make homemade ice cream without the use of that invisible aid, electricity.

All you need is some ice, some rock salt, some ice cream mix, and some humans. The latter are for helping you roll the ball around. Once you have carefully selected your desert making minions, the process is really quite simple. To create the cold yummy stuff we all love so much, shove the ice and rock salt in one end of the Ice Cream Ball, put the mix in the other end and then proceed to roll the ball around with the help of your ice cream-hungry friends.

In case you’re wondering, the ice and rock salt are placed in the ball’s outer chamber and as such never touch the cream, sugar and vanilla mix. These ingredients go in the central aluminium inner tube. When you start the shaking motion, a reaction occurs which turns the contents of the inner tube to ice cream. And that’s pretty much it.

As if making your own ice cream wasn’t ‘cool’ enough (yeah sorry about that) you now get to completely disobey what Mum and Dad used to say by playing with your food. In normal circumstances, we tend not to eat food that has been rolled around anything other than a chopping board or a bread board. However, roll this stuff to your hearts content because it is encased in plastic. You and your friends could gather round in a circle, legs astride and aim at the gaps each others legs create, the aim being to prevent the ball from passing through those gaps. Isn’t there a name for this game? Anyway, you can do all sorts but the Ice Cream Ball is not designed to be kicked hard or dropped, so avoid any heavy football antics. And if you are going to lob it at your mates, as you undoubtedly will, then care is advisable.

Once you’re fully versed in the art of the roll, get experimental and add some yummy flavours to the mix. Literally... Grab ‘em from our recipe list or make up your own. The possibilities are practically endless! The Ice Cream Ball is also great for making frozen fruit slushies and iced drinks such as Margharitas too! Regarding the mix itself, the heavier the cream the better. Using milk or single cream will produce a lighter ice cream needing higher rolling times (25-30 mins) whereas double cream or heavy whipping cream with their higher levels of butterfat will give a creamier, thicker end product and require less rolling (15-20 mins).

And once all the fun is over, remember to wash up. Soap and warm water are all you need to clean the Ice Cream Ball. Nice and easy. If you want to make homemade ice cream, this is what you need. Whether it’s for personal adult use in the garden on a hot summer’s day or for a kid’s party, the Ice Cream Ball will serve up dollop after dollop even after the cows have gone home.

Snowcone Maker

Bring on the summer, bring it on we say! When BBQ season beckons, the best thing to do is get out in the sunshine. But when it’s hot outside, there’s no better way to cool down than to suck on some flavoured ice cones. And why not do it the old-school fashion with the Snowcone Maker.

The Snowcone Maker is styled on one of those lovely looking carnival carts from the early 1900’s with its elegant old-school wheels and golden trim but this one is designed to sit on a table in your kitchen, plug into the wall and provide the thirsty masses with cones, smoothies and slushies galore.

That’s right, while the Snowcone Maker sits there looking all pretty and everything, it can also produce scoop after scoop of ice for your cone-munching needs. Simply bung ice cubes into the top of the machine, replace the plastic cover, turn on at the mains and this brilliant gadget shaves your ice and stores it in the clear container underneath.

The next step is to open that little door, scoop out some cold mush, compact into a paper cone and then squirt your preferred flavoured syrup over the icy mound. A wide variety of these syrups are available in supermarkets or online. But why not get adventurous and pre-freeze some fruit juice, milk or even yoghurt (see Serving Suggestions below) or indeed anything you want in your ice cube tray and use these clever cubes in your Snowcone Maker.

Serving Suggestions:

Snowcone: go for the trusty ol’ traditional snowcone look by adding your choice of flavoured syrup to the ice. Nice.

Slushie: expand your horizons by filling a glass with shaved ice and soft drink, tea, or fruit juice.

Fruit slushie: go for ice, fruit juice and chopped fresh fruit in a glass. Ummm fruity!

Yoghurt snowcone: pre-freeze natural or flavoured yoghurt but giving it a shave. Squirt on some syrup for added yumminess

Juice snowcone: pre-freeze the fruit juice of your choice. You’ve already guessed what to do next.

In fact you can add your freshly frozen ice slush to just about anything, whack it all in a blender and blend away. Why not try pre-frozen milk shavings mixed with bananas, strawberries or even chocolate for a great-tasting cold summer drink. The world is your oyster. Just don’t go and put oysters in the blender though…

So roll up, roll down, roll it all around and get cold as ice with the Snowcone Maker, the best way to stay too cool for school this summer. Just don’t let the kids read this!